Monday, 9 June 2008

Esqueezy Explains It All: Bizzle, Bentley’s (or lack of) and Badman DJ’s

No way has it been a month since the first Esqueezy Explains It All…and a turbulent one at that. Esqueezy’s a worker now, thrown head first into the world of grubby collar workers and office sandwich hierarchies. Everything is so straightforward that even the mugs have instructions on them like ‘sip’ and ‘hot’. But don’t watch the bitching because music is somehow keeping me going and whether I’m enjoying it or taking the piss out of it, it’s all bless. However, I’m a bit grumps because grime is being like the school bitch to me. It’s either plain AWFUL or just IMPOSSIBLE to get hold of, especially on the cotch in Manchester. It’s like being faced with a wedding buffet of oxygen cakes (and the tablecloth is naff too). I don’t care about Lethal Bizzle going on shower about the keys to his Bentley, cos its more like Fiat Panda son!

All Day Breakfast was mint. My set was scuppered by soundsystem problems and I thought it was all over…my ship was sinking…. but alas! I jumped the decks in Subspace and had a free sailing Veuve Clicquot soaked in 45 minutes (the result of an uncontrollable Schumacher moment). Ah, the joy of status drinks. It’s all about being seen holding them rather than the taste. What was the highlight of the night? Well…the Dingles used to be the only nang thing in Yorkshire, but now Steel City badman Toddla T has pushed them off the hotspot by winning Esqueezy’s Showa Hour at ADB, nicing up the dance with a bit of jackin’ bassline. If you don’t know about Toddla, then you’ve not had your head in the sand - you’ve had your head down a very deep well in Outer Mongolia with earplugs on… Witness The Frickin’ Sickness. It’s pretty funny how bassline upped Yorkshire’s game. I can’t really bully my brother for being born there anymore. for all you lost souls who have been living life in the musical poverty bracket.

I’ve got a little treat for you in the form of a mix I found on DVA’s Myspace. Scratcha/DVA is a beast of a DJ/producer on the grime/dubstep tip that I first took real notice of after copping a load of ‘Carrier Bag’ on Rinse 01/Geeneus.

Scratcha/DVA Dubstep Mix - June 2008

Check the track list on his blog at

Hopefully something interesting will kick off soon like a homosexual union of two high profile grime MC’s or the blind guy and albino in Big Brother releasing a rap tune. A freestyle rendition of Skepta’s ‘I Spy’? Sounds like Esqueezy gold.

Keep it dark.

Words: Esqueezy

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